“Officer, I drop kicked that orphan in self-defense!”

“Go sleep in the Copper Pit before you embarrass yourself again.”

“Your network in unstable? So is my mental state so knock it off.”

“What is the biggest threat facing America and by America I mean Mountain Dew?”

“It’s amazing how far we’ve come. We started with a little blue hedgehog that runs fast and now your Grandma’s chasing you down with a baseball bat.”

“Oh, you’re in pain? Have a chickpea.”

“You seem like the kind of person who would lose a bar fight.”

“Shhhh. Listen—it’s an evil pig hiding in a tree to scope out his victims.”

“My type is exclusively big-headed blue supervillains.”

“So Megamind?”

“Exclusively.”

“What’s the worst that could happen? We’re already dead—it might as well be hot.”